Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Golden Jail Bird



Hello everybody! Sorry for having not posted anything for quite some time. I have been officially "captured" and back in my "golden cage" (refer to my analogy of a chick who has learnt to fly and stuck in nest...my perspective of the nest has since changed to a cage). It was an eventuality actually but I am angry because I was dragged home 3 days earlier than I planned. My father gave me the order to return home when I disappointed him by returning to Cheras the moment we came back from Singapore. I didn't mean to disappoint him - I had just wanted to have my freedom and my own room for a little while more. Is that a crime? Apparently, it is a crime in my family law.


The transition from having my own room in a rented room to not having my own "permanent" room has been horrible. For the first few days, I resolved to sleep near Charlie's cage in the living room. But my mom who sensed my unhappiness had kept coming out to check on me in the middle of the night (and anyway, the living room is half of her bedroom). So, after 2 late nights in the living room, I moved temporarily into my grandmother's room. I am still unhappy with the arrangements, what with my clothes are in bags and my newly washed clothes back in the room that I have no access to AND the fact that I cannot find many of my things which are all in bags and arranged clumsily in the living room!


My attempts to escape from the "cage" by re-reading the Harry Potter series (ooh, the last book makes more sense to me now) and by going out to KL on my own have received comments and criticisms too. The worst part is that I could not even o out for drinks in the mamak stall with Brian! My parents are seriously driving me crazy! Their determination to lock me up in the house and my resistance to relinquish my freedom has resulted in a cold-war of some sort. Yes, I love them and I know what they are doing is a way of showing their love towards me. But enough is enough. Wasn't it true that children learn to be stronger when they fall? If they keep locking me up and keep ushering me towards what they want me to do, when will I get the chance to learn? When they pass on to the next world??


Do I sound like an ungrateful brat? Someone I spoke to did say that...Well, how would you feel if you were in my situation? I am truly running out of patience. HELP!

3 comments:

m_kaur said...

-laughing-
sorry i cant stop myself...
this is what i was n am going through everyday...
but i think need to voice out about the room part
cause if they want u at home...they hv to at least give u a space for urself...
about the going out...i still hvnt figure out what to do about that...
lets hope we get posted far....hehehehe

Viloshena said...

Well i dont know wat to say la J n NO you are not ungreatfull..who ever told you that..i to m undergoing the same thing here...like u said i just dont know why they cant see that we are all grown up now ..they think we are still young and try to control us..which is so not helpful...personally it makes me feel like a dumb la

wat makes things worse is we have at the luxury of living out n being by ourselves..thus we cant take it when ppl tell us when n how to do things

well J i dont know how to comfort u..cause i myself m going mad here..the onli thing that i can tell u is...lets jus hope that our posting is actually a blessing in disguise..if u know wat i mean..dats my only hope for now... i really, really miss all of u...

hope i dont make u feel even worse...and if u do remember that i m on d same boat so don jump la..hehehehe...cause i cant jump after u..want to get married first..hehehehe...grad i mean..if x wasting 6 yrs onli..hehehe

Doiii said...

Wei wei, i was posting comment on your "Jiawen's Theories on PKEY 3101 " haha. paise~ How are you! take care~