Monday, June 18, 2007

I'll be there for you...maybe

Question of the day:

You are exhausted after a long trip. Suddenly, you got news that your dear relative who lives 400km away is sick. Would you:

A) Drop everything and rush to be with your dear relative and his/her family, at least to show emotional support. ?


B) Say, "Oh, that's too bad" and wish him/her good health over the phone and forget about it. ?

I may be biased but I think most guys and (being racist) Chinese would do B. It's not just a matter of being sexist or racist, it's through my observation of what they call "practical". Sometimes, my mom would say: We are not the doctor, go there for what? And most recently when my nephew was sick, eventhough my dad was worried, he doesn't see the need to rush to Singapore. To him, going down and returning less than 24 hours later is unnecessary. I mean, I do understand that it doesn't help much when we are there for less than 24 hours, but I think the emotional support that we provide to my sister and her husband is also important. Not to mention that we did relieve them of the burden of taking care of their other child when we were there.

I don't know. I feel that it is very sad that some people are so practical that the phrase "just being there" doesn't make sense to them. I am not talking about my father la. He's too old and busy to rush up and down that way anyway. And my mother for that matter, should not be subjected to that kind of hectic-ness. But in the times of need, is the phrase "I'll be there for you" just a cliche?

From my observation of my Indian friends, family-togetherness and friends are very important. Friend's grandmother is sick, let's all go to the hospital. Friend's cousin passed away, come on let's go and help out at the funeral. And when you are at the hospital or at the funeral, first cousins, second cousins, far relative and friends are all there to provide emotional support. The Chinese, or my family on the other hand, are only there with a sick friend or relative when they are really, really close. I think they try to avoid being with the sick and dying because it is bad luck for some. Hmmm...Sad, right?

Well, what to do? That's life, or should I say, culture? I suppose it is truly difficult these days to find a friend, or family even, who will stick by you through thick and thin. ~SIGH~ What are we to do if this is the way of life these days, right? But fret not dear friends, because eventhough I am of not much help in times of need, you can be sure that I am just a phone call and a few permissions away. Haha...

No comments: